Hey y’all, it’s your Sumo-sized Ginger, back again. And guess what? Toxic people still suck. We’re on day four of this little series, and hopefully, by now, you’ve started to get a clearer picture of who the energy vampires are in your life.

We’ve talked about how they make you feel (drained, anxious, generally awful), how they fail at basic reciprocity, and how they react (or don’t react) to your ups and downs. Let’s recap, with a bit more detail:

The Anti-Cheerleader Squad

Imagine this: You have a brutal day at work. You’re stressed, frustrated, and just need to vent. A supportive person will listen, offer empathy, maybe even offer to help you brainstorm solutions or just be a sounding board. A toxic person? They’ll either change the subject back to themselves, downplay your problems (“Oh, it’s not that bad”), or maybe even make you feel worse about it.

Now, flip the script. You get a promotion! You’re excited, proud, and ready to celebrate. A good friend, family member, or partner will be genuinely happy for you. They’ll share in your joy. A toxic person? They’ll find a way to diminish your accomplishment. Maybe they’ll say, “Oh, well, everyone gets promoted eventually,” or “It’s probably just because they needed someone, not because you’re actually good.” They might even get jealous and passive-aggressive.

The key takeaway here: Toxic people do not celebrate your wins. They tear you down. They’re not interested in your happiness or success; they’re only interested in maintaining their own (often twisted) sense of superiority. And if someone is mean to you, they won’t step in.

Why Do We Put Up With This?!

That’s the million-dollar question, isn’t it? Sometimes we feel obligated (family), sometimes we’re afraid of being alone, and sometimes we’ve been conditioned to believe that this kind of treatment is normal (it’s not). We might think that staying connected to a toxic person will help us in some way – maybe they have connections, or maybe we’re used to the drama.

But here’s the truth: Short-term “gains” from toxic relationships are NEVER worth the long-term damage to your mental health, self-esteem, and overall well-being.

The Power of a Support Net

What you need is a support net – a group of people who genuinely love and care about you. These are the people who will:

Listen when you need to vent, without judgment.

Celebrate your successes, big and small.

Offer support when you’re struggling, even if they can’t “fix” the problem.

Show you that you matter.

Defend You when you need someone in your corner.

These are the people who will help you build resilience, boost your confidence, and create a life filled with genuine joy.

Niceness Isn’t Weakness; It’s Strength

Toxic people have thrived because we’ve, collectively, allowed them to. We’ve been taught that being “nice” is weak, that being assertive means being aggressive, and that vulnerability is something to be avoided.

But that’s all backwards. Kindness is a superpower. It takes real strength to be vulnerable, to empathize with others, and to choose compassion over cruelty.

The Call to Action (Again!)

So, I’m saying it again: If you have someone in your life who consistently makes you feel bad about yourself, who doesn’t celebrate your wins, or who generally sucks the life out of you… cut them out.

I know it’s not always easy, especially if it’s a family member or a long-term relationship. But you deserve to be surrounded by people who lift you up, not tear you down. If complete separation isn’t possible, severely limit your contact and protect your energy.

Looking Ahead

Thanks for sticking with me on this journey. I am currently researching a more indepth blog post regarding Authors and AIs. But, in the meantime, thank you for reading, and I hope you have a wonderful day filled with positivity and genuine connection. Later!